


Of Cats and Witches

by Lachenna



Series: Neko Saga [1]
Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Cat Ears, Cat/Human Hybrids, M/M, neko
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-19
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-17 10:08:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 15,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28847316
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lachenna/pseuds/Lachenna
Summary: When Allen gets cursed by a witch it will change his life forever. Kanda is determined to help him through it.
Relationships: Kanda Yuu & Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu/Allen Walker, Miranda Lotto/Noise Marie
Series: Neko Saga [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2115351
Comments: 1
Kudos: 13





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on FF.net, I'm trying out posting things on other sites.  
> Timing: It's been roughly eight months since Allen fled the Order, following the events of chapter 205.

I was excited for this mission. Link had continued to follow my every move for four months after Neah left, and now he, too, was finally gone. Nothing was going to get me down. Until I saw the mission folder. Master Cross was alive and well, and somewhere in Istanbul. And I was being sent to get him and drag him back to the Order. Damn.

And to make things worse, my mission partner was none other than Kanda Yuu, antisocial bastard and homicidal samurai. The biggest problem though, was that he was smoking hot. And that I was in love with him. And that he hated my guts.

Yet he had come after me when I fled from the Order. Those three weeks when we were on the run together were still a source of confusion. Because he hadn't dragged me back. And he had helped me find a new host for Neah. Hell, he even held me when I learned that Timcanpy was dead. I just didn't know how to process how out of character the whole thing was for him. And when I asked him why he just said he owed me for what happened with Alma. An obvious lie.

And now here we were, together in Istanbul, looking for Master Cross. I both hated and loved every second of it. Much like how I felt about a certain samurai. And I vaguely wondered if this mission was going to be as hopeless. Because even if I managed to work up the courage to tell him, he would reject me. And even if by some miracle he did accept me, and there were certainly some behaviors that made me wonder if he might, nothing could ever happen between us. We worked for the Church, and the Church considered homosexuality a mortal sin. Not even our positions as the two strongest exorcists could save us from that.

A sudden gust of cold snapped me out of my thoughts. The chilly October air flowed into the cafe as more customers came and went. I sighed and shook my head to rid myself of my melancholy. My tea was gone, and I had wasted far too much time; I was going to be late and that would only piss Kanda off more than he already was. I pulled my hood on as I left the cafe, though it did little to protect me from the wind. The streets were crowded and I wove through the people as quickly as I could.

I was near the inn when it happened, I could see Kanda glaring at everything as he waited for me. I was maybe a block away...

The woman who bumped into me was dressed rather strangely, though in my exorcist uniform I wasn't exactly one to judge. She wasn't wearing the colorful garb of the locals or the conservative style of the European tourists. It was some sort of blend of the two, and it was really ... odd. Especially with her hair. Brunette with blue streaks wasn't exactly a normal color, but again I wasn't in a position to judge. She seemed to be in a hurry, and I expected her to just keep moving, but she didn't. She turned like she was going to apologize, but froze when she saw me, or rather the rose cross on my chest.

.x.x.

I watched Allen's exchange with the strange woman from afar. I knew he wouldn't want me to intervene, but a feeling in my chest said something bad was about to happen, so I made my way towards them. My concern soared when I heard my Moyashi scream in pain. Breaking out into a run I somehow managed to simultaneously catch him as he passed out, and draw Mugen and level it at the strange woman. "What did you do?"

"You'll soon find out." She laughed and disappeared. "Curses are so much fun."

A curse? Why would anyone want to curse the Moyashi? The brat was the nicest person on the planet. It was irritating as hell and I had to go and fall in love with him anyway.

The Moyashi whimpered in my arms, and he sounded like he was in a lot of pain. I put Mugen away, and adjusted my hold on the Moyashi, carrying him bridal style back towards the inn.

I made it all of five steps before I was stopped by a man with long, vibrant red hair. _Figures_. We'd been scouring the city for three days looking for General Cross, and now he just waltzes up like he hadn't faked his own death.

"I saw what happened." His tone was all business, no traces of his usual laid back attitude. He placed a hand on the Moyashi's forehead and whispered the words of a spell. Then he swore under his breath. "We need to get him inside."

"No shit." I pushed my way past him. I knew he was following me by the critical stare boring into the back of my head.

.x.x.

Cross had been keeping track of the pair since they'd arrived in Istanbul. Their presence confirmed that the Order knew he was alive, which was what he wanted, but they had caught his trail quicker than expected. He wondered what possessed Komui to send _those two._ Alone together. They turned absolutely everything into an argument. And they were both _criticals._ It wouldn't reflect well on the Order, not that Cross cared about that.

At first he was watching his idiot apprentice, worried over how he was doing with the Fourteenth. But Cross was clever, and it took him no time at all to figure out that Neah was gone. It was relieving to know that the brat was free from that fate. Which left him time for other things, like observing the brat's _lover._ Apparently both boys were idiots. So much time had passed and they still hadn't acted on their feelings, it was painful to watch. Cross would have to do something about that. Just for the fun of meddling, not because he actually cared about love.

Cross was debating whether or not it was time to reveal himself, when circumstances decided for him.

He was proud of his skills as a magician, proud of the skills that enabled him to identify the strange woman in the crowd as a witch. And he knew right away that she was trouble. So he watched her. He watched her aura turn murderous as she noticed something in the crowd. He followed her gaze, and Cross' heart just about stopped. Allen. Though the brat was wearing his hood, so to that witch he was just an exorcist. Cross watched as she began making her way towards the teen. He grit his teeth, even with Maria's shielding he wouldn't make it. This was one of those times he regretted leaving Judgement behind, the normal pistol he carried now would be useless against a witch.

Cross ran, but in the end he could do nothing but watch as the witch bumped into Allen. He couldn't hear what the teen said, but he knew that it was an apology. The brat was too damn polite. Words were exchanged, and Allen's body language clearly indicated that he was frustrated with whatever it was the witch was saying. Then she cast a spell. A curse. And Allen screamed. Cross broke into a sprint, not noticing that Kanda was nearby until after the witch had vanished.

He caught up with Kanda and did a quick examination spell on Allen. It was not good. The curse was too complex. It would take lots of energy, as well as time that they didn't have, to reverse it. And even then it wouldn't work completely. The curse had elements of permanence, and there was simply nothing anyone could do against that. But Cross would try. His apprentice didn't deserve this. Not after everything he'd already gone through.

The first step was to get the teen inside so he could work in privacy.

.x.x.

By the time we reached the inn the Moyashi was practically screaming in pain, though he was somehow still unconscious. I placed him on the bed, my heart aching from hearing him like that. Cross immediately pushed me away. "Make yourself useful, pretty boy, and go fetch a rag and basin of cool water for his forehead."

I bristled at the nickname, but now wasn't the time to argue, so I did what I was told. As I left the room Cross started whispering spells again, and I noticed the Innocence cross in the Moyashi's left hand was glowing.

The screams had died to whimpers when I returned. I placed the damp cloth on the Moyashi's forehead, he was burning up. Not knowing what else to do, and wondering what the hell was happening, I looked to Cross.

"He was cursed." Cross spoke without looking at me, and I could hear the worry in his voice. "His Innocence is trying to fight it off, but it can only do so much."

He sighed and collapsed in the chair by the bed. "I've reversed the spell as best I can, but we won't know if it was enough until he wakes up. All we can do now is wait."

Silence fell, between the two of us anyway, the Moyashi was still moaning and whimpering in pain. I stared at the boy on the bed, my chest growing tighter as I watched him thrash. I thought about the curse that did this to him, and it made me angry. Unconsciously I tightened my grip on Mugen's hilt. "Why?"

"Hmm?" Cross was once again directing that critical stare at me, and it felt like he could read me like an open book. When he was done sizing me up, his focus returned to the boy writhing on the bed. "I can't say for sure, could be any number of reasons. Most likely it's either a case of mistaken identity, or he had the bad luck of running into a witch who simply enjoys cursing people." He smirked at me in a way that made my skin crawl. "Unless she caught him cheating at cards, I seriously doubt that this is because of something he actually did."

I growled at the implication and returned the smirk. "After what happened while he was on the run from the Order, he was forbidden from touching cards ever again." My smirk morphed into a glare when I noticed that his expression hadn't changed. I wanted to smack it off him, but since I couldn't do it physically, I settled for doing it verbally. "And even if that was the case, wouldn't it technically be your fault? Since you're the one who taught him to cheat in the first place?"

Cross returned my glare, and I almost regretted baiting him like that. "Big words for a pretty boy with girly hair."

I expected better from him. My hair was an easy target, and honestly it only bothered me when it was the Moyashi that insulted it. "Looked in a mirror lately? Your hair's pretty girly too."

I was cut off from saying more by a sudden screech from the Moyashi on the bed, and our attentions turned back to the boy. He was drenched in sweat, his hair and clothes clinging to his body, it made him look thinner and sickly. I changed the cloth on his forehead, he was even hotter now, paler than I'd ever seen him before.

When I finished, I watched in fascination as Cross showed his fatherly side and gently removed the Moyashi's clothes and tucked the still thrashing boy under the covers. I gaped at the out of character display. He caught my stare and glared at me briefly before turning his attention back to Allen. I hadn't expected him to answer my unspoken question. "He was out of it for over a month after the incident with Mana. I was the one who took care of him back then."

He didn't say anything more, and I had no reply, so we fell into silence. Then the Moyashi's screams started up again. And his body started changing. And all we could do was stand there and watch as the curse took hold of him.

The screams faded to whimpers, then even those died away. Allen lay on the bed, silent and still, only the slight rise and fall of his chest letting us know that he was still alive. The green glow of his Innocence faded and we knew it was over. The only thing left was for him to wake up and see what he had become.

It was eerily silent in the room. Cross leaned back his chair, propping his feet on the bed and lighting a cigarette. I didn't pay much attention to him, still worrying over my Moyashi. I vaguely heard him say that he was going to go after the witch when he was done here, and that Komui might be able to do something about Allen's current condition.

"As for you..." My focus snapped to him as he addressed me. His one eye narrowed as if he was reading my soul. "What exactly are your intentions towards my idiot apprentice?"

I almost, almost, jumped in surprise. But I collected myself and glared at the red head. "What are you going on about?"

Cross smirked, and I cringed inwardly. Somehow this man knew about my feelings, hell, he'd probably known since we first met back on the Ark. "There's no point in denying it, pretty boy. I know that if it was up to you, you'd fuck him into the mattress without a second thought."

He slowly and deliberately put out the cigarette and lit another, we both knew that my ability to speak was long gone. "What I don't know is this: is that as far as it goes, or do you actually have feelings for the little idiot?"

It was a lie. We both knew it was. We both knew that he knew exactly how I felt. We both knew that I was madly in love with the boy.

My glare deepened, and I managed to grind out, "He hates me, so what does it matter?"

"Idiot. Just tell him. I can guarantee that his response will be different from what you're expecting."

_Wait does that mean that Allen likes me? No. There's no way. He hates me-_

Cross snickered as if he knew what I was thinking. "The list of people my idiot apprentice hates yet cares for consists of two people: myself and that moronic inspector that Central had following him around." He took a drag on the cigarette, and gave out a short bark-like laugh. "Hell, knowing him there's probably a few of the Noah on that list too."

"Your point?" I growled out. I did not like that this man could read me so easily.

He laughed. "My point, pretty boy, is this: I know what Allen's hatred looks like. And it's not the tit for tat insult thing that he does with you."

His one eye seemed to bore a hole in my head as I tried to process his words. I had no retort, so I simply continued to glare at him. "So?"

"So you should probably fuck him before you take him back to headquarters." I was surprised to hear concern behind those crass words. But mostly I was shocked that he seemed to condone everything I wanted to do to that boy.

"What?!"

Cross sighed and stood up, running a critical eye over the still sleeping Moyashi. "That boy's self-esteem is going to take a major hit from this. Knowing that his crush wants him might just keep him from breaking completely."

With that he was gone. The lingering smell of cigarette smoke the only proof he'd even been there in the first place.

I wondered if he was messing with me, if he wanted to get me to embarrass myself by confessing to someone who didn't love me back. But if that was the case, he would have stayed to see it. And though he had messed with me all afternoon, it was the Moyashi that he really enjoyed tormenting. That, combined with the concern I'd just witnessed, confirmed that despite appearances the General really did care about his apprentice's well-being. Which meant only one thing: he wasn't lying about the Moyashi's feelings for me.

While I was standing like an idiot in the middle of the room, the Moyashi began to stir. My eyes drifted over to the beautiful lump of white as the silver eyes flickered open.


	2. Chapter 2

My head hurt. Actually my whole body hurt. It was just that my head hurt worse. And my lower back felt like it was on fire. I tried to move, but everything hurt and it only made my headache worse. I was vaguely aware of a wet cloth on my forehead, it felt soothing and I wanted to fall back asleep. That was when the sound of someone breathing reached my ears, and I knew I wasn't alone.

I opened my eyes slowly, blinking against the light. A glimpse of a blue blur and I let out the groan I'd been holding in. It was Kanda, the love of my life and bane of my existence. I didn't want to see him, not like this, not after having passed out in the middle of the street. But he knew I was awake now, having moved closer to the bed I was in. I managed to croak out, "What happened?"

"That's what I should be asking you, Moyashi." His hands were on my shoulders, helping me sit up.

"The name's Allen, Bakanda." The retort had no bite to it, I had no energy to fight with him. Instead I took the glass of water he was offering and sipped it slowly.

My vision cleared and the pain faded, leaving only a stinging in my back and a dull headache. Kanda took the empty glass back and walked to the table across the room. His movement stirred the air in the room and I caught a familiar scent. "Why does it smell like Master's cigarettes in here?"

Kanda clicked his tongue, standing with his back to me. "Because he was here while you were unconscious, baka."

"You found him then?" I don't know if I was happy or scared.

He clicked his tongue again, still facing away from me. "More like he showed up right after you passed out."

"Oh. Where is he now?"

Another tongue click. "Gone. He went to find the witch that cursed you."

I frowned as the memory of what happened before I passed out came back to me. And suddenly I was scared of why Kanda wouldn't look at me. "What happened?"

The fear must have been evident in my voice: Kanda sighed, and it sounded sad. Without warning he tossed something at me and it landed in my lap. "It'll be easier if you see it for yourself."

I looked down at the mirror, and slowly picked it up, scared of what I would see. And at first glance my reflection remained unchanged. Like always, the first thing I noticed was the white hair and bright red scar, the marks of my other curse. But then I noticed the change and let out a very undignified squeak.

On top of my head, sticking out of my hair, was a pair of white cat ears. My breath grew ragged and my heart was pounding louder, I was scared. I reached a shaky hand up to my head, and brushed my fingertips against one of the ears. And I squeaked again.

The fur felt soft and smooth, but that wasn't what freaked me out. What freaked me out was that I could feel my fingers through the ear. They were real. I actually had cat ears. Another thought struck me then, and I moved my fingers down to the side of my head. My human ears were gone. I felt the tears coming and I whimpered, trying to hold them back.

"There's more." Kanda's hand was on mine, and before I could react to the touch, he guided my hand down to my lower back, letting go when my fingers made contact with more soft fur.

This time the tears did fall. I had a tail. And now that I was aware of it, I could feel it move. This was awful. I was already a freak, this just made it worse. Kanda would never want me now. He could barely even look at me like this.

Suddenly there was extra weight on the bed, and I found myself wrapped in a tight hug. My mind stopped as the scent of soba and soap filled my nose. Why was Kanda hugging me?

"Cross says that the curse was supposed to turn you into a cat completely. That it's because of your Innocence and the reversal spell he did that you only partially changed. He says that the only way to change you back is to find the witch. That's why he left. The only other option is to hope that Komui can find a potion that will do the same." My sobs died while he spoke. I couldn't understand why he was so close, but I wanted it, so I didn't try to fight.

When I was done crying he pulled away. But only a little. He remained close enough to wipe the trails of tears from my cheeks. My eyes locked with his deep colbalt ones. And he didn't look away. He spoke again, and it was hesitant and unsure, so very unlike Kanda. "He also said ... that I should ... tell you ... that I ... love you."

.x.x.

The Moyashi was just too adorable. Seeing him with cat ears was making it that much harder for me to resist jumping him. I had to look away. I knew it would hurt him, but me suddenly trying to take advantage of him would hurt him more.

Then the brat had to go and start crying. I was doing my best to resist the urge to get close, but then I heard him mumble something about being a freak. And I couldn't stop myself. I was next to him in a split second, sitting beside him and pulling him tightly to my chest. I related everything that Cross had told me about the curse as best I could, figuring that knowing what was going on would help him cope.

And it worked. He stopped crying. Then he looked up at me with those big silver eyes and I knew, I knew in an instant that what Cross had said about his feelings was true. Not that that made admitting mine any easier. But I managed to say it. I managed to tell my Moyashi that I loved him.

He said nothing. He just blinked at me. Then his hands fell from my shoulders and he laughed. "Of course! I'm dreaming!"

It was my turn to stare as he sat there giggling. I was a little ticked that he took my confession as a joke. I flicked his forehead and he fell back on the mattress. The giggles didn't stop. I leaned over him and growled. "Baka. What makes you think you're still asleep?"

"Because." It was hard to hear his words through the giggles. "I know that my dreams are the only place I'll ever hear you say the words I've been wanting to hear ever since I met you."

The laughter wasn't at my expense then. It was relief over everything else being a dream. I almost didn't want to spoil it, but I'd be damned if I let him squirm out of responding to my confession like that.

Placing my hands on the mattress on either side of his head, I leaned closer, until my face was mere inches from his. He was still laughing, though it was a little more sporadic. That white hair was splashed across the pillow and the cat ears twitched with every giggle. He looked absolutely delicious and I felt my pants grow tight. I glared at him with all the anger I could muster, which wasn't much as my blood was trying to rush south. "I've got news for you then, you're wide awake."

Then I closed the distance and kissed him.

.x.x.

Kanda was kissing me. The last of my laughter died in my throat. It was surreal. Like the hug. Or those words. I didn't know how to respond.

He pulled away when he noticed that I was frozen. "Shit. Don't start crying again."

I was crying? I blinked a few times, and sure enough there were tears running down my face. I looked up at him. The expression on his face was unreadable, but I could tell he was waiting for me to do something, so I voiced my confusion. "I don't understand."

He gave an exasperated sigh and flicked my forehead again. "Are you sure that you're seventeen? Because you're acting more like you're twelve."

I felt my ears and tail twitch as I hissed at the insult. Like a cat. Apparently the changes were more than just cosmetic. Kanda pushed himself back into a sitting position in response to the noise, and I whimpered and tried to curl up in a ball.

"Damn, Moyashi, I was wrong. You're not acting like a child, you're acting like a girl on her period." He sighed and reached out, touching my right ear gently. "Though I suppose that given the circumstances it should be expected."

He began stroking my ear. I don't think he was aware of the action, it seemed like a reflex to me. But it felt surprisingly good. It was comforting and relaxing. I felt myself falling asleep.

Then it suddenly stopped. I looked up at Kanda to see what happened. He was staring at me, his expression bordering on shock. "Were you just purring?"

My eyes widened in horror. I buried my face in my hands and curled up tighter. This was too much, I couldn't take it anymore. The sobs came again, and this time they didn't stop. Kanda's hand returned to my head, and he stroked my ears until I fell asleep.

.x.x.

Clearly the Moyashi's head was a little screwed up over what happened. Fuck. I didn't want to let him ignore my confession, but he obviously needed time to process the changes he was experiencing. So I let him fall asleep. Besides, a sleeping Moyashi was infinitely preferable to the crying, hormonal one I'd been trying to deal with.

I was at the end of my patience with him. Honestly I was surprised I lasted that long. Though I suppose that could be chalked up to the worry that came from loving the little brat. He would be facing my usual way of dealing with him when he awoke, whether or not he was back to normal emotionally. I couldn't coddle him anymore.

Grabbing Mugen, I stalked out of the room, intending to find somewhere to train and blow off steam. I was halfway down the hall when I realized that I couldn't leave the Moyashi alone like that. Especially when I didn't know where Cross was. I couldn't let that bastard be the first person Allen saw when he woke up. I returned to the room swiftly. Guess I'd have to settle for meditation.

.x.x.

It was an hour later when the Moyashi woke up. Though the rumbling of his stomach started a good ten minutes before that. Knowing he wouldn't want to leave the room, and having ulterior motives, I had the finder stationed in the next room go fetch some dinner.

Sure enough, the first thing the brat did upon waking was eye the tray of sandwiches on the table. He sat up excitedly, but then his expression darkened and he tried to curl back up.

"Oh no you don't." I grabbed his shoulder roughly and pulled him out of bed. "I've been listening to your stomach try to eat itself for the past ten minutes. You can cry like a girl all you want later, but right now you need food."

I pushed him down in the chair and shoved the tray towards him. His face was bright red as he looked up at me. "Um, Kanda? Why am I naked?"

"Fuck!" I had forgotten Cross had done that. I turned around immediately and began looking for the brat's clothes. "Because your master is a bastard. That's why."

Not seeing the clothing in question, I went to his suitcase and grabbed fresh ones, tossing the pieces at the brat's head. "Hey!"

I smirked at him, and his angry smile faltered. "Aren't you going to leave so I can change?" He asked expectantly.

"Nope." I crossed my arms across my chest. "If I leave you alone you'll just curl back up in bed. Besides, Moyashi, I don't get what all this false modesty is about. We've got _community baths._ I've seen you naked hundreds of times." _And enjoyed every single one of them._ But he wasn't ready to hear that last bit just yet.

He grumbled as he pulled on his boxers. I sat back to enjoy the show. However he suddenly froze when they were mostly up. The realization hit us both at the same time: his tail. That beautiful white appendage was going to prevent his clothes from fitting properly. Acting swiftly, I snatched the knife from the table and grabbed the Moyashi by his hips. "Don't move." The warning wasn't necessary, he had frozen under my touch. I knelt down behind him, and used the knife to make a hole in his boxers. It was rather crude, but it would do for now. Without asking for permission, I grabbed his tail and slid it through the hole, then yanked his boxers the rest of the way up.

He hadn't moved. Looking up, I could see that he was still frozen in shock over what just happened. I rolled my eyes, apparently the brat was still an emotional wreck. I draped his shirt over his head. "Put your shirt on. I'll fix your pants."

"Why are you being nice?" He asked as he buttoned his shirt. "Shouldn't you be laughing your head off at me?"

I handed him his pants. "First: I don't laugh out loud." I paused, that wasn't quite right. "Unless the Baka Usagi were to fall down the stairs or something, and even then it would probably only be a short chuckle."

I watched in fascination as the Moyashi slid his tail through the hole in his pants without touching it. The second his pants were on I pushed him onto the chair and shoved a sandwich in his mouth. "Second: do you remember what happened earlier?"

He stopped eating and looked at me curiously, obviously thinking hard. I growled at him. "Eat. Or are you too stupid to eat and think at the same time?"

"Bakanda." He grumbled but obeyed, and once again began shoving food in his mouth.

The last sandwich was halfway to his mouth when it suddenly clicked. "W-Wait. You- You actually meant that?"

"Baka." I leaned in and kissed him again. And this time he kissed me back.


	3. Chapter 3

_"Baka." I leaned in and kissed him again. And this time he kissed me back._

The kiss was rough and I could tell he wanted it just as much as I did. Though it didn't take a genius to figure that one out. He was the one who shoved his tongue in my mouth. I was not going to let a bean sprout get the best of me, and fought back.

He did get the best of me though. His tongue was a distraction from his hands, which I failed to notice were in my hair until he pulled out my hair tie. "You little-"

He cut me off with a short laugh, and then we were kissing again. His hands tangled in my hair, and his tail wrapped around my leg.

_Well two can play at that game_. My hands found their way to his hair, but they didn't stay there. They went to his ears, those wonderful cat ears that made him even more attractive than usual. I stroked the soft fur, and smirked internally as he started purring. The sound was captivating, I felt like I could listen to it forever.

The Moyashi broke the kiss the second he realized what was happening, backing away with tears in his eyes. I growled and grabbed his wrists. He tried to pull away, but I wasn't about to let go. "Don't. Don't cry. I can't take any more of that."

His tears didn't stop, but he did get angry. It was a relief, an angry Moyashi was one I knew how to deal with. "And what else am I supposed to do, Bakanda? I've been turned into a fucking cat! Just when my life was back together! Just when the Order started to trust me again! And now it's all over! Because some woman decided to turn me into a fucking cat! No one is going to want to be around me!"

"Allen!" He froze when I used his name, just like I expected him to. "No one is going to care! Fuck, Lenalee and that Usagi will probably be all over you even more than they already are! You're so fucking adorable like this that I'm not going to be able to get any alone time with you!"

He giggled. Once. I had gotten more than my fill of his giggles earlier, and kept shouting so I wouldn't have to hear any more. "We don't know that this is permanent! Cross is out tracking down the witch, and you and I are going back to headquarters first thing in the morning to see Komui about this! He may be psychotic, but he _is_ a genius when it comes to strange things like this! He might be able to do something!"

He started whimpering again. "What now?" I snapped.

"That hurt my ears." He smiled sheepishly. "Apparently my hearing is a lot more sensitive than it used to be."

"Baka." I pulled him close. It felt good to stand there with our chests pressed together like that. After so long I finally had him in my arms, and I didn't want to let him go. But there was still something I needed to hear him say. "Does it really matter what everyone else thinks? I don't care that you're different. Isn't that enough?"

He giggled again, that sound was really starting to get on my nerves. "Actually, you said that I'm adorable. Yuu~ "

I glared down at him. I didn't know how to respond to him saying my first name like that, but even the part of me that hated my name had to admit that it sounded good when the Moyashi said it.

"And it's more than enough that you don't care, Yuu~. Or rather, it's more than enough that you _do_ care." He buried his head in my neck. "I've loved you for such a long time. And we've been through so much. It just feels so good to finally have you. Even if you were a total prick in the beginning."

"Oi! You weren't all that perfect in the beginning either, you know." He looked up at me, those big silver eyes full of confusion. I kissed him gently, or rather, as gently as I was capable of, I would never be able to be truly gentle. "I much prefer this version of you." I smirked. "The you that swore three times in the last two minutes is far more interesting than the you that was overly polite to everyone."

Before he could argue I kissed him again, this one more like our first. Our tongues battled for dominance while his fingers played with my hair and I undid the buttons on his shirt. I yanked the garment off of him when we broke apart for air.

"Hey!" I smirked at the protest and began kissing his collarbone. "What was the point of getting dressed if you were just going to undress me so soon?"

I hooked my fingers into the belt loops of his pants, and whispered in his ear. "You were the one who didn't want me to see you naked."

"Ri- nnnghh!" His retort was cut off by the moan he made when I bit down on his shoulder. His fingers suddenly released my hair and flew to my chest, where he had my exorcist jacket open in the blink of an eye. I shrugged the coat off, but he wasn't satisfied. His fingers slid under my shirt and impatiently tugged it upwards. I broke away from marking him to pull the shirt over my head and toss it aside.

We stood there panting and simply staring at each other. His bright silver eyes had become a deep mercury. It was a look that I recognized from all of our fights, but only now was I realizing that it was lust, and not hatred, that was making them that way. His lips were parted for air, and from the expression on his face I almost expected him to start drooling. The ears atop his head twitched with each breath he took, and his tail swayed behind him, occasionally brushing against my calf. I don't know why, but the touch felt so ... erotic. My eyes drifted to his chest, taking in the scars that marred his pale skin as my gaze moved lower. I smirked, his pants looked as tight as mine felt. Good, he wouldn't object to what I was planni-

Clearly I wasn't paying enough attention to him. His hands were suddenly on my shoulders, and before I know what happened, my back hit the floor, hard, a loud crash accompanying me as I fell. The breath knocked out of me, I gasped for air, only to find breathing hard due to the weight of a Moyashi on top of me. Our legs were tangled together, along with the legs of the chair that he had apparently pushed us into.

He tried to push himself off me, but I stopped him, grabbing his hair rather roughly and pulling him into an equally rough kiss. Our bare chests pressed together was a thrilling sensation, and I couldn't resist thrusting my hips upward and grinding our clothed erections together.

The Moyashi made a sound that was somewhere between a moan and a meow. I could feel the embarrassment flowing off of him, but I didn't let him pull away. Instead I ground our hips together once more and made him repeat the sound again. This time he responded by deepening the kiss, and God that boy was good with his tongue.

My moan was drowned out by a loud knock at the door. "I heard a crash. Is everything alright in there?" It was that idiot finder. He didn't respond to all the screaming the Moyashi did earlier, but the chair falling he heard. I was going to kill him.

I broke away from the Moyashi to respond, but the moronic finder had already opened the door. I was seriously going to murder him. "Out!" I gave him my best death glare. But then the Moyashi was pulling me back to him, and our lips were crashing together once again. The sound of the door closing in a hurry signified that the finder had gone.

As the Moyashi and I kissed I thought about what the finder saw: me, Kanda Yuu, shirtless, pinned to the ground by one Allen Walker, also shirtless, with cat ears and a tail, legs tangled together and making out. It put me in a rather bad light. Never mind that homosexuality was supposed to be a bad thing. Never mind that he probably assumed the cat ears were fake and part of some weird fetish. Never mind that he saw _my_ Moyashi without his shirt, though he would definitely have to pay for that. No, what really bothered me was that he saw the Moyashi _on top._ I was going to _annihilate_ him.

"You can kill the finder later, Bakanda." I blinked as the Moyashi whispered in my ear. "But right now I need you here." He thrust his hips into mine and let out another moan.

I captured his lips and kicked the chair out of my way rather violently, losing my boots in the process. When my legs were free, I broke away, standing up and pulling the Moyashi along with me. I pushed him towards the bed, not caring that I missed and he ended up sprawled half on and half off of it. He righted himself as I stalked quickly to the door and locked it.

I returned to the bed to find him sitting on the edge in only his boxers, which did very little to conceal his arousal. His ears perked up expectantly as he smirked at me. I narrowed my eyes at him. "Impatient are we, Moyashi?"

He hopped up and wrapped his arms around my waist. "Very." He whispered huskily in my ear. "I've been patient for two years. I don't want to wait any longer."

As if to prove his point, he pulled my pants and boxers down. Then he began rubbing his tail up and down my naked thigh. I glared at him, but it wasn't very fierce because I was moaning. He smirked. "I think I could get used to having a tail if it does that to you, Yuu~."

That singsongy way he said my name made me want to smack him upside the head. I knew he was trying to goad me into saying his, and I was not going to give into that quite so easily.

I returned his smirk and pushed him over onto the bed. He yelped as I yanked off his boxers. Now we were both naked. It wasn't until I climbed up on the bed with him that I noticed it wasn't a good yelp. He was lying on his back underneath me, hands fisted in the sheets, looking away from me with his eyes squeezed shut. I sighed. "Are you still on that not wanting me to see you naked thing?"

"No..." He said stubbornly, then sighed. "Yes... Maybe? I don't know." Another sigh and then he started babbling. "It's not that I don't want _you_ to see me naked, Yuu. It's more like I'm not comfortable with being naked around other people. I would always catch someone staring at me in the baths, and it really creeped me out. So I started bathing at strange times when I knew no one else would be around. The staring stopped, but even then it almost always feels like someone's watching me. It's just so unnerving!"

Apparently I wasn't as stealthy as I thought with my Moyashi watching. I leaned in and kissed the mark that I had made on his shoulder. "I didn't know you felt like that." I worded it so that it sounded vaguely like an apology, trying to get the Moyashi to look at me. I wanted to see his face when I told him. And it worked. His eyes snapped open immediately, and he turned to face me. I snickered. "But it's definitely not my fault that you chose _my_ shower time as _your_ private time."

The look of shock on his face was priceless. But I only got to enjoy it for a few seconds before it morphed into one of anger and the Moyashi punched me in the stomach. "That was you? Bastard."

I smirked down at him. He hadn't hit me very hard, which meant that he wasn't as angry as he pretended to be. "Of course. I love seeing you naked. You're so delicious..."

I bit a different spot on his collarbone, making him moan and forget about his anger. Then I proceed to do the things I had wanted to do to him ever since I started watching him. I kissed his scars. Covered him in hickeys. Sucked on his nipples. And basically just turned him into a writhing, moaning mess.

He played with my hair for a while, then his hands began to roam my body. But when his finger nails started clawing at my back, I had to stop him. I pulled his hands away and pinned his arms above his head.

And that's when I froze. I didn't know what to do next. I only had a vague idea of how sex between two men worked. All I knew came from a few overheard conversations that I was too shy and too proud to fully listen to. And I knew enough about anatomy to know that I couldn't just take him, not without causing extreme pain.

"Don't know what comes next, Bakanda?" Despite how out of breath he was, I could hear the smirk in his voice, it dripped with smugness.

"Oh and you do?" I shot back. He laughed in response, as if it was obvious that he did. I glared at him. "How?"

He blinked innocently up at me, and waited for me to piece it together. "General Cross." I practically spat the name. Yes it was definitely that bastard's fault that the Moyashi knew so much about sex.

When my attention turned back to the Moyashi he was grinning devilishly. It sent a shiver down my spine. "So," the sweetness in his voice was at odds with his expression, "you have only one option for continuing this..."

"Fuck no, I am _not_ letting you top me."

He laughed again. "Then you'd be choosing to not fuck at all."

I glared down at the smirking boy, he looked very much like a cat right then. And he was so very smug. Like he knew he would get his way. "You could just tell me what to do." I growled.

More laughter, it was bordering on evil now. "Not a chance." His voice was singsongy. "I wanna know if your love for me is stronger than your pride, Yuu~"

_Which did I want more: sex with my Moyashi, or to keep my pride intact?_

While I was arguing with myself, his tail began brushing against my thigh, causing me to moan at the touch. The Moyashi's grin practically split his face, victory was his.

"Fine." I managed to grind out, and I released my grip on his arms. My throbbing erection certainly wanted the sex. _And it's not like anyone will ever find out, the Moyashi certainly isn't going to go around telling people that he topped me. I just have to pay attention to what he does so that I know for next time._

He slithered out from under me, and pushed me down so the top half of my chest was pressed against the mattress. I wanted to question him, but then he was kissing the back of my neck, and I lost the power of speech. His mouth worked its way down my spine at an agonizingly slow speed as he moved towards my lower end, and all I could do was try not to moan under his touch. I would let him top, but that didn't mean that I had to let him know that I enjoyed it.

He forced my knees further apart as he knelt between them. Then he licked my entrance and I almost cried out.

.x.x.

Allen smirked at Kanda's feeble attempts to not make noise. He was failing miserably, especially with Allen's now enhanced hearing, but the white haired boy wasn't about to tell him that. No, he was enjoying it far too much.

He wanted to take in the sight of the blue haired boy beneath him, but it felt like a fluke that the samurai had even agreed to this in the first place. Worried that the unpredictable man would suddenly change his mind, Allen went straight to work.

Pulling away slightly, he shoved three of his human fingers inside of his mouth and coated them thoroughly with saliva.

Kanda meanwhile, was distracted by Allen's tail. The furry appendage was stroking his thigh, an action that only fueled his need and made it harder to control his moans. It may have seemed like an involuntary action, but he knew the white haired cat-boy was doing it on purpose.

A wet finger circling his entrance made Kanda forget about the tail. Those few circles were his only warning before Allen shoved the first of his fingers inside of Kanda.

Kanda's world became a mixture of pleasure and pain. He was used to pain, he was a fighter after all, and knowing his body could heal any wound had made him unafraid of getting hurt. But this was something else entirely. Allen's finger moving around inside of him didn't just hurt, it felt good too.

He tried to keep control of his senses, he wanted to stay aware of what that boy was doing to him, but the feeling was just too much. Especially once Allen added a second finger and began stretching him.

Allen's only regret was that he couldn't see Kanda's face. The stifled moans and grunts the man was making were music to his ears, and he wished he could see the facial expressions that went with them. He wanted to see that constantly scowling face light up with pleasure.

But he was the one in control. And he had chosen to put the samurai in that position. On purpose. He knew that he needed to _stay_ in control, and that meant that he couldn't see Kanda's face. Those cobalt eyes killed his focus, and right now he needed all the focus he could muster. Especially when most of his blood was flowing away from his brain. Kanda's earlier ministrations had made him beyond hard, and he'd never gone so long without touching himself before.

So Allen focused everything he had on the fingers inside of Kanda. He thrust and scissored as urgently as he could without hurting the samurai. Though to be honest, his sadistic side wanted to hurt him, but however good that would feel now, it wouldn't be worth it in the long run.

Everything changed for Kanda when Allen's third finger was added. He found himself wanting more and began unconsciously thrusting his hips trying to increase the feeling. Then the nimble digits brushed against a spot that made his vision blur. Pleasure coursed through his veins and the heat coiling inside him grew. He wasn't going to last much longer. Summoning what was left of his voice he ground out, "Damn, Moyashi, hurry up."

Kanda's voice was even rougher than usual and so filled with lust that Allen almost lost control when he heard it. Instead he grit his teeth and brushed his fingers against that spot one more time. As the samurai gave a half strangled cry, Allen swiftly pulled his fingers out of him. He didn't know if Kanda was properly stretched, but he couldn't wait any longer. He lined his member up with Kanda's entrance and pushed inside.

There was no pleasure this time. All Kanda felt was the pain. And it was his own fault. He hadn't thought that that bean sprout of a boy would be big enough to hurt him. All he felt was the pain because he had underestimated that brat, just like he'd been doing since the day they met.

Then the pain started to fade and the pleasure returned. He let out the breath he wasn't aware he'd been holding. Allen's strained voice snapped him back to awareness. "Does that mean you're ready for me to continue?"

Kanda tried to answer, but couldn't manage anything more than a grunt. Allen took that as a yes, and pulled slowly out of the samurai, before thrusting back in. The tight heat almost too much for his nearly unbearable need.

The more Allen moved, the more pleasure Kanda felt. And then the pain was gone and he felt his hips moving to Allen's thrusts. They moved together, achieving a harmony they usually only found on the battlefield. Then Allen's member hit Kanda's prostate.

The samurai couldn't help it, his control was gone, and he cried out. But what neither boy expected was for him to cry out the other's real name. "A-Aren!"

He knew he was close, hell after that outburst, he knew they were both close. For Kanda to say his name like that he had to be barely holding on. Allen thrust harder, battering the samurai's prostate. His right hand firmly grasped the man's hip, and his left moved down to stroke the thus far ignored erection.

Something hard yet soft grasped his member. The feeling was so surreal that it actually caught his attention amid the pleasure that had overtaken him. The hand shaped thing began to pump his shaft, but it felt so different from a real hand. Yet somehow the pleasure it gave was exponentially better than any he could give himself. As he lost himself again he finally figured out what it was, Allen's Innocence hand.

Kanda came without warning, spilling his seed over Allen's hand and the bedsheets underneath him. His walls tightened unexpectedly around Allen, and the cat-boy came immediately as his member was squeezed.

Both boys were locked in the euphoric high of orgasm, unaware as their legs gave out and they collapsed in a heap on the bed.


	4. Chapter 4

Kanda was the first to recover from the high. He shoved Allen off of him and sat up on the edge of the bed. His regeneration abilities had slowed dramatically since the incident with Alma, making him more like a normal person, and as such he was in pain. Not a lot of pain, it was just a dull ache in his lower back, but it seemed worse because his tolerance was still low. And the feel of Allen's semen flowing out of him didn't help with his discomfort.

The sun had set while they were having sex. Kanda was torn between laying back down and taking a shower. At the very least he needed his pants. But even with the streetlights shining through the curtains, it was too dark to see them. He looked around for a lamp, and his gaze landed on Allen, who was now sitting up on the bed, smirking at him like he'd been watching the whole time.

The smirk was the best Allen could muster. He felt like grinning from ear to ear after what happened, but things changed when he opened his eyes. He'd always been able to see well in the dark because of his time with Cross, but this went beyond that. He knew that it was dark, but he could still see everything in the room. Especially Kanda as he struggled to move. It was amusing, but the newfound night vision was a reminder that he was now part cat, and his post-orgasm euphoria was fading rapidly.

"Am I amusing you, Moyashi?"

"My name's Allen, or did you somehow manage to forget that in the last two minutes?" He snapped back, after everything earlier he did not want Kanda to know that he was growing depressed again.

Kanda clicked his tongue. Something was wrong with the brat. He expected the boy to be hyper. Or smug. The boy should be rubbing what just happened in his face. He should be teasing him for letting him top. Instead he was defensive, like he'd done something wrong. He narrowed his eyes at the brat. Allen's ears were pinned back against his head. "What's wrong with yo- oh."

He figured it out before he was done asking. But then it wasn't hard to miss. Allen's eyes were practically glowing. And they looked very much like a cat's. Unlike the ears and tail, which Kanda had found adorable, this was slightly off putting, but that didn't matter to him. What mattered was that the Moyashi was not going to take this new development well.

Allen squeezed his eyes shut and turned away from Kanda's stare. And was promptly flicked in the forehead for the third time that day. "Baka. Look at me."

"No." Allen didn't move. He couldn't move. If he looked at Kanda he'd see those cobalt eyes staring back at him, those eyes he couldn't hide his feelings from, and the tears he was currently repressing would escape. And Allen was not going to cry over this anymore.

Kanda clicked his tongue and flicked the brat's forehead again. He got no reaction so he pushed himself off the bed as quickly as his sore back would allow. "Fine, be that way."

There were a few thuds from Kanda bumping into furniture as he gathered his clothes and left to take a shower. But Allen didn't know that that's where he had gone. He just knew that Kanda was gone. The tears he'd been holding back threatened to fall. His inability to face the changes to his body had scared off his lover. And it had to happen right after sex too. Everything had been so perfect just minutes earlier, and now... Well, now Kanda was gone. And he probably wasn't coming back. Of course if Allen had been thinking straight he would have known that Kanda was simply giving him the space he needed, but his emotions were on overload after the reminder that he was now part cat. But he did know one thing: if he didn't get a grip on himself he would lose Kanda for good.

.x.x.

When I returned to the room the Moyashi was lying down on the bed, still naked, but the soiled top sheet had at least been removed. The light was on, and from the way the boy's ears perked up at the sound of the door he was clearly awake. "Are you feeling better now, or do I need to leave again?" I asked from the doorway.

He sat up and faced me, but the action seemed forced. "Don't go." His words were quiet, he'd been crying again. "I'm still a mess, but please don't leave. I can't-"

A half strangled sob cut off his words. I rolled my eyes. "If you want me to stay, I'll stay. Just... I can't take any more crying, so try to keep it down, ok?"

He giggled in relief as I made my way to the bed. I winced internally at the sound. It was still irritating. "And no giggling. That's worse than the crying."

He huffed and shot me a mock glare. "Any more rules I need to follow?"

I smirked. "I can probably think of a few..." That got a smile out of the boy, but it faded instantly when I tacked on, "Moyashi."

He narrowed his eyes at me and mumbled something that sounded a lot like "bastard". Apparently he was feeling well enough to argue. I sat on the edge of the bed and ruffled his hair, succeeding at making him purr.

He shoved me away immediately. "Knock that off, Bakanda."

I didn't. I enjoyed the sound too much. I also enjoyed that the Moyashi didn't like it. He shoved me away again. "Gah! Why are you such a bastard?! Shouldn't getting laid have made you a nicer person?!"

The exasperated look on his face was priceless, and I couldn't help laughing at it.

I was cut off by the Moyashi's lips pressing against mine. It was a brief kiss, but it was good. "I guess you have changed a little, Yuu~. You have a wonderful laugh."

He looked beautiful, and I'm not sure why, but I was feeling really good, probably from the sex, and I leaned in and whispered in his ear. "Only for you, Allen."

He kissed me as soon as I got the word out. This kiss was deep and intense, and we were breathing heavily by the time we broke apart. If that's how he always reacts to me using his real name, I would definitely be doing it again- but only sometimes, it would lose its power if I used it all the time.

I attacked his hair again, and this time he didn't fight back. He leaned against me and purred into my chest, wrapping his arms around my waist. I could tell that he was still unhappy with the fact that he was purring, but he wasn't fighting it anymore. I wasn't one for displays of affection, but for the first time in a long time I felt truly happy, so I let him hug me.

The embrace didn't last long. It ended rather quickly when the Moyashi's hands slid under my shirt and began to rub my sore back. The action alone wasn't much, but the tone of his purring changed, revealing that he had devious intentions. Stopping my petting, I forcibly tilted his head up so that our eyes met. I was greeted with the smug smirk I'd been expecting earlier. Allen was ready to tease me for letting him top. I pushed him away from me. "Say what you want to say so we can get this over with, Moyashi."

"It's no fun if you play along, Yuu~." He fake pouted, then stuck his tongue out at me. "And all I was going to say was that you made some wonderful noises when you were under me. I'd love to hear you make them again sometime, Yuu~."

"Hell no." It was a gut reaction from my pride, but there was definitely a part of me that wanted to let Allen top me again. Not that I was ever going to tell him that.

He laughed. "I figured as much. I'm surprised you even agreed to it in the first place."

"Heat of the moment, Moyashi. That's all. Don't read anything into it." I glared at him, but his hands had returned to my back and the touch was arousing.

He snickered as he slid his hands into my pants. "How am I supposed to do that, Yuu~? I asked you to choose between me and your pride, and you chose me. You chose your love for me."

"Che. Baka." His wandering fingers found my abused entrance and I winced at the touch. "What do you think you're doing?"

He smirked at me. "At the moment I'm enjoying seeing you in pain, Yuu~."

.x.x.

Kanda finally snapped.

As much as I had enjoyed topping him, and as much as I wanted to do it again, it felt backwards. And part of me wondered if maybe that's why I was still so uncomfortable with my ... changes.

There was really only one way to find out, so I started baiting him. It wasn't too hard, I had plenty of practice at getting on his nerves after all. Especially with the knowledge that hearing me say his first name aroused him. Not that I was any different on that front. Kanda had my blood boiling with just one whisper.

I knew he was ready to jump me, so I not so subtly reminded him that he had been submissive to me. And that was it. He had my hands pinned above my head and my back pressed into the mattress in seconds. The kiss he started was rough and bruising, but it was what I wanted from him; those earlier kisses when he was trying to be gentle were nice, but they just weren't Kanda. This, where he was kissing me so hard I thought I might pass out from a lack of air, this was right.

.x.x.

Kanda didn't need an explanation, or conversation, or even permission. He could see the satisfied smirk on Allen's face and the cat-boy's growing erection. He didn't need words to know that the white haired boy was ready for another round.

The foreplay was much shorter this time, and it wasn't long before Kanda was grinding their naked members together. He wanted to make Allen beg, but what he got was close enough. The white haired boy growled impatiently, then he grabbed Kanda's hand and shoved the fingers into his mouth, licking every surface and slicking them up well.

When he was finished Kanda wasted no time in tossing the cat-boy's legs over his shoulders, lifting Allen's hips off the mattress so that his tail no longer blocked his entrance. Then Kanda shoved one of his long, skinny fingers into the exposed hole.

Allen cried out when Kanda's finger penetrated him. The subsequent thrusts and wiggles had him moaning. His cry for more was answered with a second finger being shoved roughly beside the first. He could feel the samurai's impatience in the haphazard way the fingers stretched his passage. It hurt, badly, yet it felt so good.

A third finger, then more rough scissoring, which led to a stray finger brushing against a spot that had Allen writhing in ecstasy. Kanda wanted to enjoy it, but his ignored erection couldn't wait any longer. He withdrew his fingers, rewarded with a delicious whimper from the boy.

Allen tried not to scream at the pain of Kanda's length pushing into his clumsily stretched hole. It felt like he was going to rip apart. Then the motion stopped, and the pain began to fade. When he was ready he managed to spit out, "Move, Bakanda."

At the cat-boy's bidding, Kanda pulled almost all the way out then thrust back in. He knew his actions had been a poor imitation of Allen's, but he didn't particularly care if he was rough with the brat, especially when he knew that Allen would tell him if he took it too far.

Kanda's thrusts found a rhythm with the motion of Allen's hips. They moved together, until Kanda hit Allen's prostate. The cat-boy cried out as he saw stars. A few more hard thrusts to the spot, and Allen came. The spasming muscles around his member pushed Kanda to the edge, and after one more shaky thrust, he released inside Allen.

Allen's legs fell from Kanda's shoulders, and he blinked up at the older man. There was something he wanted to say, but the exhaustion was setting in, and he was asleep before he got the words out.

.x.x.

Despite my annoyance that the brat passed out immediately, I couldn't help but appreciate how wonderful he looked in that moment. His hair was tangled and strewn about, and his skin glowed with a faint sheen of sweat.

I surveyed the mess we'd just made and decided it wasn't worth cleaning up. Not when there was another bed in the room. The Moyashi was easy enough to carry, so I moved him to the other bed and climbed in beside him. The brat was finally mine. I was never going to let him go.


	5. Chapter 5

I was surprisingly warm and comfortable when I woke up that morning. It felt so good that I could easily ignore the ache in my lower back. I didn't want to get up. Yet as my senses came into focus, I began to panic: they were much sharper than I was used to. I took a deep breath and tried to concentrate on what I was sensing. Maybe knowing exactly how they had changed would help me adjust.

The first thing I noticed was the smell of Kanda's shampoo. He was nearby. That subtle floral scent was everywhere, covering, but not hiding the smell of the room, which, after several days of sleeping in it, smelled of Kanda and myself. Yet I could pick out details, like the scent of the soap used to wash the sheets of the bed I was in. I could even make out traces of what we had done the night before. The scent of Master's cigarettes also lingered, though it was faint.

The room was quiet, but as I listened to what was around me things got loud really quickly. Once again the first thing I noticed was Kanda. The sound of his breathing was closer than I expected it to be, but I didn't dare open my eyes and find out exactly where he was. He was close enough for me to hear his heartbeat, its gentle rhythm indicating that he was still asleep. However, as I listened to his heartbeat, I noticed that I could hear my own as well. And that was freaky, so I focused on something else. The lack of noise from the street outside told me it was still early- too early for the tourists to be out, though some of the locals had begun their daily routines.

My tail - oh dear God I really have a tail - was wrapped around my left leg. I had avoided looking at it, only seeing enough to know that it was white like my hair and ears. I didn't want to know what it looked like. Yet somehow I knew that it was long, just a few inches short of touching the ground when I stood. It was weird to have and be aware of another appendage. I didn't like it. Even if it was incredibly useful on Kanda.

To change my train of thought, I let my eyes drift open. All I could see was navy blue. Kanda was close enough that his hair was in my face. I tried to turn my body, to get a better look at the room, but couldn't move. That's when I realized exactly how close Kanda was: the warmth I felt was him. His chest was pressed against my back and his arms were wrapped around my waist. I tried to pull away, but his hold was strong. I wouldn't be able to move away without waking him up.

So I settled for moving his hair out of my face. I blinked at what I saw. I was confused. We were in Kanda's bed. But we had had sex in mine. And I was pretty sure that I had passed out as soon as we had finished. Kanda must have moved me. And cleaned me up- I was wearing my boxers. I expected him to have left me in the messy bed. Waking up in his bed with his arms around me was just plain weird. I still thought of him like yesterday hadn't happened, his confession of love still seemed like a dream. And it was safest to think that way; my heart was safer if I accepted that he never truly loved me, that he just said those things to get in my pants.

I felt him stir, his heartbeat and breathing began to change: he was waking up. I expected him to push me away when he realized we were cuddling. He pulled me closer. It freaked me out, so I tried to pull away from him. "What do think you're doing, Moyashi? You're mine now. You're not getting away."

He was still half-asleep. I could hear it in his voice. What he said was scary, yet somehow reassuring. I knew he meant that, and I knew he wasn't just talking about the cuddling. He thought of me as his possession. "And what if I want to leave, Bakanda?"

"Then you shouldn't have told me you love me." He laughed briefly, then kissed the back of my neck. He was fully awake now.

His lips sent sparks down my spine, and I immediately lost my train of thought. One of his hands left my waist, but the pleasure coursing through me distracted me from my chance to escape. In some corner of my mind I knew exactly what he was doing, knew that he was doing something I didn't want him to do. But his fingers were already tangled in my hair. It felt so good, but they didn't stop there. They kept moving until they were caressing my ear. His calloused fingers felt spectacular against the soft spot where my ears met my head. I wanted him to continue, but more than anything, I wanted him to STOP. IMMEDIATELY.

But I knew he wouldn't. And his lips on my neck were preventing me from escaping. I couldn't stop him. And even worse, I couldn't stop the reflex he was triggering. I could already feel it in my chest. The growing rumbling.

Kanda's kisses stopped the moment the purring started. I could feel him smirk into the back of my neck. He knew I hated the purring, the reminder that I was part cat, the reminder that my life had once again gone horribly awry.

But as much as I hated it, I loved the feeling. I loved his fingers playing with my ears. I only wanted him to stop so that the purring would stop. Yet some part of me knew that if I did make him stop he'd just find another, more embarrassing spot to pet and trigger the purring. So I didn't fight it as we lay in bed that morning.

"You're awfully quiet, Moyashi." Kanda's breath tickled the back of my neck, and I had to suppress the urge to giggle.

I rolled over and glared at him, pulling his hand from my head. "I thought I was being plenty noisy."

"That's not what I was talking about." He smirked at me and tried to pet me again, but I had his wrist in my Innocence hand and he couldn't break my grip. I gave him an innocent smile as he narrowed his eyes at me.

"You actually want me to talk? Aren't you the one who tells me to shut up because I talk too much?"

"Yes, but given the circumstances..." He sighed and gave me a small smile. "You shouldn't hold things in, Moyashi."

I rolled my eyes at him. "What do you want me to say? That I'm not ok? You already know that." I felt my ears twitch as I started to get angry, and the fur on my tail bristled. The sensations were so alien, and they only served to fuel my anger. "Fuck! The sooner we get to Komui and get this fixed the better. I can't stand being like this. But you already know that too."

"Yes, but don't you feel better having said it out loud?" He smirked, and it made me want to smack him. I growled at him and pushed him off the bed.

Or I tried. He still had an arm wrapped firmly around my waist. So I went over the edge with him. And for the second time that trip, Kanda and I ended up on the floor, tangled together.

Only this time it wasn't in the middle of making out. And this time it hurt. Bad. I screamed.

.x.x.

I was just messing around. No, actually, if I'm being honest, I was trying to get the Moyashi to stop overthinking things so that we could have sex again. That's why I pulled him off the bed with me.

Only things went wrong when we landed really hard. It knocked the wind out of me, but that was nothing compared to the pained screech the Moyashi let out.

In my slightly dazed state it took a moment to figure out what happened. But once it clicked, I scrambled away immediately. We had landed on his tail.

The screeching died to a whimper once my weight was no longer crushing his tail. I knew from experience exactly how well Allen could handle pain. This must hurt like hell for him to be crying over it. No, that wasn't it. It was more like the first time I had a hangover. He had no frame of reference for the pain he was feeling, and that made it seem worse. It probably didn't help that his head was still screwed up over the whole thing.

I didn't know what to do. I wanted to console him, but I didn't know how. Or have the patience for that. I had used up all of that yesterday.

So I did nothing. I just sat there and waited for him to stop crying.

.x.x.

Fuck that hurt. Not the worst pain I'd ever experienced, I'd been stabbed too many times for that to be true, but it was still worse than I could have ever imagined. I now officially hated that tail. The pain faded quickly once Kanda was no longer sitting on it and pulling it at a weird angle, but that brought a whole slew of other problems. The tears I thought had dried up started falling once more, and I couldn't stop them.

I don't know where they came from. I was well aware that my situation wasn't hopeless. I wasn't even that upset over what happened anymore. Fuck, last night was one of the best nights of my life. The man I loved loved me back. And I probably wouldn't know that if it weren't for what had happened.

I took a deep breath and forced myself to calm down. Lying on the cold floor was not helping anything. I pushed myself into a sitting position. Kanda was sitting just out of arm's reach, staring at me. He looked... worried. As much as I liked knowing he was concerned about me, the look was very wrong on his usually scowling face.

"Sorry, you said no more crying." I forced a smile, trying to make a joke.

"Don't." Kanda's voice was harsh. "Don't try to push things away. You're clearly not alright."

"We've already established that." I sighed and stood up. "But I can't keep dwelling on this. I need to move on. So let's just go back home, ok?"

"I have one question first." His usual stoic expression was back, but the worry hadn't left his eyes or his voice.

"And what would that be?" I held my hand out toward Kanda, and when he took it I helped him to his feet.

He wrapped me in a hug, his right hand drifting down my back to rub the base of my tail. "Is your tail ok?"

My tail swished behind me as he rubbed the sore spot on my back. Not just sore from the fall, but from last night's activities as well. My body was reacting to the touch in the same way it did to him petting my ears. I pushed him away before I could start purring. "It's just fine, Yuu. A little sore, but fine."

Just then I caught the aroma of food nearby. Though with my heightened senses, 'nearby' was probably more than a few rooms down the hall. But it was still strong enough to make my stomach rumble.

Kanda opened his mouth to speak, but a knock at the door interrupted him. "Kanda-dono? Walker-dono?"

"What?!" One look at Kanda and it was obvious that he still wanted to kill that finder.

"Umm. I took the liberty of ordering breakfast for you. It should be here in about ten minutes." The finder sounded scared, I wondered if he realized that he saw something he shouldn't have. "I, umm, I wanted to make sure you knew so, umm, so you'd be ... awake and... dressed..."

I heard the finder start to walk away, muttering to himself. Curious, I focused and tried to hear what he was saying. What I caught was '-And not make anyone else witness things that will keep them up at night.'

I almost laughed at how traumatized he sounded, but I was distracted by the curious stare Kanda was giving me. "You can still hear him."

It was a statement, not a question. But I answered it anyway. "Yes. I can hear a lot of things I couldn't before." I placed my hand on his bare chest. "Like your heartbeat."

It was a cheesy thing to say, but it worked. He leaned in and kissed me. And I desperately needed that kiss. I needed a direct confirmation of his love, and I knew I wasn't going to hear him say those three words again. A kiss on the lips was the best I'd get, and that's what he gave me.

When we broke apart I immediately moved away, and began looking for my clothes. "What are you doing, Moyashi?"

I laughed as I threw on a shirt. "Getting dressed so you won't have to plot murder when the food gets here." I turned around in time to catch Kanda's glare. I returned the look with a smirk. "Don't think I don't know how possessive you are. We're going to have to have a long chat about that..."

I finished buttoning my shirt, and picked a pair of pants up off the floor. They weren't mine, so I threw them at Kanda's head. He caught them and pulled them on.

I found my pants under a chair, freezing momentarily when I caught sight of the hole Kanda had cut in them. Hopefully Johnny could fix that once my tail was gone, they were my favorite pair. I slipped them on quickly, trying not to notice my tail threading itself through the hole. It felt no different from slipping an arm through a sleeve, but knowing that it was a tail made it creepy.

"You stopped moving, Moyashi. Do I need to be worried?" Kanda's words snapped me out of my thoughts, and I quickly returned to dressing myself.

The knock at the door came right as I finished tucking in my shirt. I looked over at Kanda, he still hadn't put a shirt on. He began to open the door, and I panicked, diving to the corner where my jacket rested over a chair. I pulled it on and threw up the hood, hiding my ears and tail from sight.

Kanda got dressed while I ate breakfast. Which took all of two minutes; after three days that finder still hadn't figured out that I need more food than normal people. But at least my stomach wasn't empty anymore.

.x.x.

The Moyashi hadn't said anything in almost an hour. Sure he'd been in the bathroom some of the time, but still. Most days I would have given anything to make him shut up, but today the quiet was unnerving. He was brooding again. I wished I could make him see how much more beautiful those cat ears made him, but I knew it was a lost cause; sex hadn't worked, and I didn't have the social skills to talk about it with him.

But at least he was showing me his true feelings. If I was anyone else he would've been pretending to be ok. And they'd have believed him.

There was something different this time though. He was staring at me as I got dressed. And his gaze almost seemed angry. As I buttoned my coat it hit me, he had moved on from the cat thing and was moping over a different subject.

I locked eyes with him, and snorted when he looked away. "Are you really that jealous, Moyashi?"

He glared at me. "Are you really surprised?" He mocked. Then he gave an annoyed huff. "Of course I'm jealous. It's been almost two years since I broke critical. That general's coat should be mine."

"And it will be, in three months." I understood his frustration. Even if I hadn't wanted my own promotion, the Moyashi deserved his. He just had to wait a little longer.

"Two months, three weeks, and two days."

"Oh, so you're impatient too?"

"After two years of Central doubting my loyalty? Hell yes."

"I'm surprised you don't blame Komui."

"Why would I blame him?" The Moyashi sounded genuinely confused, like the idea that the supervisor could be at fault had never occurred to him before.

"For making you wait until your birthday."

"Oh."

"Do you even know why he's making you wait?" It was something that had been bothering me for a while, but I could never ask without giving away my feelings for him.

Allen sighed and dropped his gaze. "It's because I'm only seventeen. He doesn't want to put me in such a high risk position until I'm an adult."

"That's stupid." Between his eye and the whole thing with the Fourteenth, the Moyashi was already the exorcist in the most danger. Making him a general wouldn't make things any worse for him.

He sighed and shook his head. "Did you know that Komui looked up the records of all the past critical breakers?"

"So?"

"Before you and me, the youngest to break critical was twenty three."

"Do you have a point?"

"I was fifteen." I saw where he was going now, and his next sentence made it all the more clear. "I'm also the only parasite type on the list."

"Komui thinks you might have the Heart."

Allen opened his mouth to speak, but was interrupted by a knock at the door. "Kanda-dono, Walker-dono, it's time to leave."

.x.x.

I hoped that finder realized just how badly Kanda wanted to kill him. Not that I knew either, but if I was that irritated with the guy, Kanda must have been furious.

We gathered our suitcases and headed out of the inn, thankful that the finder was only escorting us to the ark gate and not actually coming with us.

I was also thankful that it was cold outside and there were very few people on the streets. It meant there was less noise to hurt my ears, and less chance of anyone seeing them. My coat hid them from sight, but it wouldn't take much to knock my hood off.

About three blocks from our destination, my eye activated. Kanda sensed me stop, and stopped as well. "Where?"

"The river, under the bridge." I activated my Innocence as I turned around. "About twenty level ones. There's a level three as well."

Kanda drew Mugen and began walking back towards the bridge. "You should check your reflection when this is over, Moyashi."

The akuma sprang from hiding before I could question what he meant. I jumped up and started slashing at the level ones, knowing that Kanda would want to face the level three. There was a problem though: I was currently part cat.

My hood had come off when I activated my Innocence, exposing my ears. In the heat of battle, I didn't care about appearances, but akuma are loud. Especially for how sensitive my ears were now. The smell of their poison was much stronger than it used to be too.

But that wasn't the real problem. No, the real problem was that I had discovered a new way in which my body had changed. I pushed off one akuma to reach another, and I missed. I overshot it. It only took a moment for me to figure out what had happened: I was stronger than I was before I changed. I had always been flexible, having spent so much time at the circus, but as I dodged bullets it soon became clear that not only was I much more flexible, I was also faster. All good things, in the long run, but there, in that moment, they were throwing me off. I should have easily wiped out those level ones, instead I was in danger of losing.

.x.x.

I had finished off the level three. I searched for the Moyashi, expecting him to have finished off the others long ago, only to see him still fighting. Something was wrong. I'd spent a lot of time watching Allen fight. That group of akuma should have been no match for him. Yet he was struggling. He wasn't moving like he usually did.

It hit me when I saw him stumble. He was having difficulty with how being part cat had changed his body. I itched to jump in and help him, which wasn't new, I usually felt that way when he was in trouble. I'd just never been able to do so before without starting a fight with him. I could help him now, and I wanted to, but in this instance, he needed to do this alone. I'd hurt more than his pride if I tried to intervene.

.x.x.

Kanda, in his usual bastard fashion, was just standing there, watching me fight. I usually didn't need or want his help, but it always frustrated the crap out of me anyway, that he could be so cold to a comrade. For some reason though, I had expected things to be different now that we were together. It was stupid of me to think he'd change overnight.

I stumbled over my footing once again. Why was it so damn hard to adjust? I needed to pretend I hadn't fought before, forget all my training. I had to focus on what my body wanted to do, listen to my instincts, like I had done with my senses earlier.

The akuma finally defeated, I landed surprisingly gracefully on my feet. I was pissed off, and out of habit, and lack of other targets, I took it out on Kanda. "What the hell, Bakanda?! Couldn't you see I needed help?!"

"And what would have happened if I had helped, Moyashi?" His glare was calm. "Like it or not, but we have no idea how long you're going to be stuck like that. You had to learn how to fight eventually."

"So you just stood there and watched?!"

"They were only level one. And the street's deserted. It's not like there was any actual danger."

I hated that he was right. But that wasn't the only thing I was mad about. "But what about-"

"Don't." Kanda cut me off, he almost sounded emotional. "Don't finish that thought. That has nothing to do with this."

"But-"

He cut me off with a brief kiss. "Stop talking."

Kanda had just kissed me in a public place. I couldn't have talked if I wanted to.

"Thinking with your heart may work for you, but it doesn't for me. I can't let my feelings change how I act on the battlefield. I know the others buy into all that teamwork crap, but you're like me, we've both grown strong by depending only on ourselves. You can argue with me all you want about it, but love is only going to make us do stupid things."

I don't think I'd ever heard Kanda say so much without cursing. He'd also admitted to loving me. "You're so cynical, Yuu."

He pushed me away with a hand on my forehead when I tried to kiss him. "Deactivate your Innocence before you kiss me. I'm not going to risk having you bite me while you're like that."

"Like what?" I blinked in confusion. "What are you talking about?"

"Your teeth, Moyashi."

I brought my right hand to my mouth. "What about them- oh."

I ran my tongue over my teeth to confirm what my fingers had felt. I had fangs. And they definitely weren't there earlier. This whole part cat thing was really getting on my nerves.

Like Kanda had implicated, the sharp teeth disappeared when I deactivated my Innocence. I sighed. I wonder how many more surprises this curse has in store for me...

.x.x.

The finder was dead. The akuma had gotten him. It wasn't surprising to me, he'd been especially inept.

What was surprising was that the Moyashi didn't seem to care. "What's with you? Aren't you supposed to get all sad and mopey when people die?"

He sighed and leaned against me. "Normally, yes. But in this case..." He shook his head. "In this case it's better this way."

"'Better'?" It was hard to process soft-hearted Allen thinking that it was good someone died. "How?"

When the Moyashi finally spoke again his voice was quiet. "He was going to tell people about us."

I didn't understand. "Why is that a bad thing? It's not like people are going to care that we're gay."

He gave me a look of disbelief. "For starters, homosexuality is considered a mortal sin. Meaning that if Central feels like it, they could have us executed."

I stared down at him, ready to object to his reasoning, but he wasn't done talking.

"Then there's the whole sex outside of marriage thing, which they don't care about nearly as much as they claim to, but they could certainly punish us for that. They've also got bans on certain sexual positions, one of which happens to be the one used between two men. And to top it all off, if they wanted to, they could charge you with rape because I'm technically a minor."

"Relax, Moyashi. We're exorcists, it's not going to be that bad." I refused to be afraid of what ifs.

Allen snorted and rolled his eyes at me. "I've been locked up for treason. You've been part of human experiments. It is going to be that bad."

I didn't have a retort to that. It was too true to deny. I'd have to try a different tactic. "So are you saying you don't want us to be together?"

He froze. "No! Of course not! I-"

I cut him off with a kiss. "Then stop fretting. As long as we act like nothing's changed between us no one will ever find out."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you don't want to do the math for yourself: the countdown Allen recites places this chapter's events on Oct. 2nd.


End file.
